EMOTIONAL ROLLERCOASTER: Which direction did they go?

So I wrote previously how I’m holding-on to faith to see me through – but that’s ME … curious about my brother, my sister, my (from HS) best friend, and my dad.

Where do people who either commit blantant suicide as well as disregard STRICT warnings of impending death and die as a result go?

Where do people who questioned whether there’s a God go?

I cannot fathom, my dad who did debate ‘God’, God being unloving and casting him aside for being human!

I cannot fathom God casting my brother away because he too was human!

I cannot fathom God casting my sister away because she was human!

And, worst of all, I cannot fathom MY God casting my best friend who committed suicide at the NAIVE age of only 16 because she was human!

My God is a forgiving God; it promises us that in the Bible. It was preached to us during my brother’s services. YET, during that ‘service’ we were told a sin is a sin is a sin and as long as you’ve Jesus in your heart, you’ll be allowed into Heaven.

So, like, if Hitler asked Jesus into this heart as he was taking that pill he entered Heaven and my dad didn’t? I FIND THAT PREPOSTEROUSLY unacceptable!

Nothing personal, God, but I believe this is some serious proof many of your ‘followers’ are misinterpreting your Words. Yes, we should believe Jesus was our savior but surely even God has ‘limits’ – and my not telling small children their grandfather hung himself (a lie, in the eyes of God, mind you) will put ME in the same ‘boat’ as Hitler! Nahhhhh, sorry, will not buy into that!

I DO NOT believe all sins are equal – and I guess, according to those preaching, I need to ask God for forgiveness in that regard; but I’m human and refuse to believe God can’t see through into people’s souls to find whether the deep is truly good (and to me, THAT IS ALL THAT TRULY COUNTS!).


Peace & hugs …